I AM A MASTER OF SINANJU, HEAR ME ROAR.

You did not ask to be white. So perhaps that is not your fault. You did not ask to be here. Perhaps that is not your fault, either.

BUT THIS IS HOW I FEEL ON THE INSIDE, CHIUN.

Women should stay home and make babies. Preferably, manchild.

HE IS THE ONLY MANCHILD I’VE SEEN LATELY.

PART OF ME REALLY WANTS TO EAT THIS…

It would be better for you to eat this can than what is inside of it. Why must everything in this country be coated with monositi-… monosoti…

MONOSODIUM GLUTAMATE. YOU CAN’T EVEN SAY IT!

I can say “rat droppings.” That does not mean I want to eat them.

WORD.

YOU KNOW, CHIUN, YOU’RE A REAL PAIN IN THE ASS.

That is because it is the fastest way to your brain.

WHATCHYOOTALKIN’BOUT, LITTLE MAN? I’LL WHOOP YOUR CHINESE ASS!

Chinese! KOREAN is the most perfect creature ever to sanctify the earth with the imprint of its foot.

YEAH BRAH. I CAN SEE THAT VERY CLEARLY. FOR REALS, MAN UP – I’M ‘BOUT TO KICK YOU IN THE BALLS.

Breathe out… slowly… do not gulp. If you do not breathe correctly, you do not move correctly. Pitiful. I can see the deadly hamburger has done its evil work. This is your future:

SWEET FANCY MOSES, CHIUN! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO SHOW ME SHIT LIKE THAT, SON?

Is this more to your liking, slow-footed yak?

YOU KNOW, CHIUN, THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I REALLY LIKE YOU.

Of course. I am Chiun.

FUCK IT – LET’S GO TO CONEY ISLAND, CHIUN.

BONUS ROUND:

SEPARATED AT BIRTH?

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1 Comment

Filed under fun at work, hypothetical conversations with obscure movie characters, nuggets of infinite wisdom, separated at birth?, sinanju, tomfoolery

One response to “I AM A MASTER OF SINANJU, HEAR ME ROAR.

  1. tiger cola

    re: coulter-canine look alikes. which one is better to fuck up the ass?

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